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Predators Grooming in Plain Sight
Posted on Friday, September 18, 2020
When I was growing up we had this little hot dog stand around the corner from us. I always liked going there because the owner kept black olives in stock to put on my coney dogs for me. So it was no big surprise that when I turned 16 or so, I got my first real job there. I used to work by myself, or just the owner and I sometimes, from open to close. It got really boring being by myself and when the owner was there, he always made small talk about how my life was going. He was really interested in my relationship - which to a teenager, heck yeah! - someone understood me!
As a naiive teenager, I thought it was so cool that he wanted to talk about my relationship with my boyfriend all the time. I never had any clue to the fact that he was "grooming" me until I was older.
So one day, we are working together and I am getting ready to go deliver some hotdogs to the local factory. Bossman is blasting Rolling Stones on the radio like he always did and I am in a fluster to get out the door on time for the delivery. Right before I leave Bossman says to me:
"Hey you, can you do me a favor?"
"I have to go buy my wife some new bras and I don't know their size - you look about the same size. Mind if I feel for comparison?"
"Sure!" - - and just like that, my elder boss cupped his hands around my breasts for what seemed like forever. "Got him a good feel".
And just like that, Bossman took advantage of the fact he was my boss and I was a naiive teenager that didn't see any wrong doing at the time. I thought it was a little weird, but never saw the whole picture until years later.
I moved on and found a better paying job. I would still visit the stand every now and then, to see my friend who was working and grab a hot dog. I even tracked down Bossman on Facebook and tried to add him - which just turned into a Facebook conversation I wasn't ready for. I was 21, just had my first child. And instead of congratulating me, he send me a message asking if I was married prior to having my son. And when I responded no, I got a message reading "There are not too many bigger issues than getting married before you decide to have kids. Deep down inside you have to know that you should have had those issues resolved before you jumped in the sack, besides if you wait until you can afford to have kids, every couple would childless, and no one would be married."
This threw me for a loop and I started to really think - why would someone be so... mean?
It wasn't until years later, as I was driving by the empty lot, which once housed the hotdog stand that burned down, that the memory of him touching my breasts popped up in my head. Then, as my older brain registered everything, it all made sense! Never once in the almost 10-15 years he was open did he have a male working there. It was all teen females. The defensive message he sent me over Facebook. This guy was a pervert.
Now I often wonder - was he a full time pervert, taking advantage of the teen girls he had working for him - or just me? When I search him on Facebook, I shudder to the fact that he has pictures of his grandchildren swimming posted along side photos with him and local politicians (ding ding, there's my clue).
And I never told anyone, because I never thought anything of it. But the fact is, he was my boss. I was probably too embarrassed to say no at the time because why would I deny the man who gave me my first job something "so simple"? This is how perverts and predators get away with grooming children! Parents - TALK WITH YOUR CHILDREN about how their bosses and supervisors should and should not treat them. I can only image how often something like this goes un-talked about in everyday life. It can leave long lasting scars and mental issues with children if they let things get to them mentally!